1. I laugh at everything you say.
“Everything you say is funny. I’m prepped to laugh before you’ve even finished the sentence. You are the king of comedians. Nah but seriously—stronger eye contact, smiling, hair touching (my hair, not theirs. That’d be weird.)”
“Everything you say is funny. I’m prepped to laugh before you’ve even finished the sentence. You are the king of comedians. Nah but seriously—stronger eye contact, smiling, hair touching (my hair, not theirs. That’d be weird.)”
2. I touch you and insult you a lot.
“I’ll generally come up with excuses to touch you and probably insult you a lot.”
“I’ll generally come up with excuses to touch you and probably insult you a lot.”
3. I ‘magically’ get to the bus stop the same time as you.
“My boyfriend and I, before we got together, kept magically getting to the bus stop at the same time. Our timetables coincided nicely, but I did occasionally have to miss the very first bus that turned up in order to make it happen.”
“My boyfriend and I, before we got together, kept magically getting to the bus stop at the same time. Our timetables coincided nicely, but I did occasionally have to miss the very first bus that turned up in order to make it happen.”
4. I’ll put my foot next to yours and say, ‘Oh, your feet are so big compared to mine!’
“I still do the stupid putting my foot next to his thing and saying something like ‘Oh, your feet are so big compared to mine!’ Worked a couple of times.”
“I still do the stupid putting my foot next to his thing and saying something like ‘Oh, your feet are so big compared to mine!’ Worked a couple of times.”
5. I ask you when we’re getting married.
“I just ask them when we’re getting married.”
“I just ask them when we’re getting married.”
6. I pretend I hate your fucking guts.
“If I like you, ‘I hate your fucking guts’…but that’s just me.”
“If I like you, ‘I hate your fucking guts’…but that’s just me.”
7. I steal your hat.
“Professional hat stealer here.”
“Professional hat stealer here.”
8. No bra.
“Not wearing a bra when I know I’m going to see him.”
“Not wearing a bra when I know I’m going to see him.”
9. Cleavage.
“Cleavage. Lots and lots of cleavage.”
“Cleavage. Lots and lots of cleavage.”
10. Constant touching.
“Touching. Like constantly. On the arm, shoulder, hair, leg. Any reason to touch him.”
“Touching. Like constantly. On the arm, shoulder, hair, leg. Any reason to touch him.”
11. I say you’re cute, then compliment your skills.
“Say they’re cute. Compliment their efforts (i.e., making paper airplanes). Sit close to them. Body language like mirroring theirs. Touching their shoulder or hand.”
“Say they’re cute. Compliment their efforts (i.e., making paper airplanes). Sit close to them. Body language like mirroring theirs. Touching their shoulder or hand.”
12. I will stare at you until you feel uncomfortable.
“I will make eye contact and stare at you until you feel uncomfortable.”
“I will make eye contact and stare at you until you feel uncomfortable.”
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